Anything you want, Princess!
Hey sunflowers,
I hope this blogpost finds you well, both physically and mentally. This month I’ve been learning, the hard way, the difference between self-soothing and self-care. For a long time I thought taking time to do things that felt good was self-care. I mean I would watch whatever I want, eat whatever I want, I mean it was literally WHAT EVER YOU WANT Princess. But the day would feel good, and by the end of the week I needed a feel good day again. I was self-soothing. I was just putting on a bandaid long enough to get me to the next time I could self-sooth. For years I thought I was “practicing self-care”. But really I was just slapping on the bandaid with things that FELT good instead of things that were actually good for me. Things I actually needed.
Now before we proceed, I want to make it very clear everything is a balance. There are time when anything you want princess is valid, warranted and frankly necessary. But it’s only an act of self-care when that it is what you need not just something that feels good in the moment. I learned that doing things that are challenging can be self-care. For example missing workouts and not drinking water because it’s anything you want princess, is NOT self-care. Spending $100 at a restaurant that I should be saving and investing also may not be self-care. Those are self-soothing acts that provide temporary pleasure but are hurting me in the long run.
So that’s the test, if your act of self-care only has temporary pleasure and is not bettering you for the long-term, it’s self-soothing. And there is a place for that. I promise there is a time to self-sooth. But this may be your season of self-CARE! Be sure that you aren’t keeping yourself from growth by making what feels good the habit instead of healing and working toward the best version of yourself.
I love y’all. I pray this doesn’t come off as judgmental or preachy. I just wanted to share my own realization.
I love y’all so deep! Until the next one…
forever blooming,
Mikaela Amira
