Friends?

Hey Sunflowers,

I’m coming to you with a heavy heart because today we are talking about a very sensitive spot for me. Friendships. I want to start this with a disclaimer that I am in no way, shape or form an extraordinary friend but I hope to be, one day.

Friends can literally make or break your experiences. They can make any and everything enjoyable or they can hurt you to your core and initiate baggage you will carry to your future relationships. Today we are taking about how to recognize “friendships” that need to go.

Being able to recognize a toxic friend could’ve saved me so many tears. I mean breaking up with a friend can HURT! But it is often times necessary. These are three tangible ways to recognize friendship that need that snip snip…

We all have friends that have been our friends for so long we don’t even think about it. It’s so routine and comfortable to consider them a friend because they’ve been there so long.

But sometimes we allow those friends to walk over us in ways we would never let “new” friends. When you first begin a friendship you’re always paying attention to a person’s loyalty, how they treat others, especially how they treat you. But with an old friend sometimes you feel that Historic Obligation. Well, I can tell you right now, LET IT GO. If the only thing keeping you in a friendship is time spent, it is not a relationship worth your time.

My linesister always reminds me to pay attention to how long it takes someone to ask you how you’re doing. She is so right! When you speak to someone, is it always to ask you to do something?

Now there is grace involved in this, of course. Sometimes you have a great friend who is really going though something that is stifling their ability to be there for others. We grant grace to those friends, I have been that friend. I am talking about the friends who just genuinely don’t think about you until it’s convenient or advantageous for them. That’s not the kind of relationship you deserve.

Last but definitely not least, is feeling unenthusiastic or uninspired surrounding your friendship. You should be excited to see your mate.

You should leave your experiences with your friends wanting to be even better, inspired by the conversations you had or even just lighter as a result of their presence. If you leave experiences with your friends drained, annoyed, OVER IT, it may be time to let it go.

I hope this was helpful. Or at the very least starts a conversation with yourself about assessing your friendships. I missed you all last week, but I needed the time! TAKE YOURS!

forever blooming,

Mikaela Amira