Grief

Hey Sunnies

I am so sorry I missed a Self-care Saturday; it has been a lot going on. This week I’m coming to you with a heavy heart. For more reasons than one the past week or so has been filled with grief. There has been so much death around. It seems like I woke up one day and there was just so much sadness. I knew so many people grieving all at once, including myself. At first I wanted to make a blogpost with the message of staying hopeful, but I’m struggling with hope myself. So, I’ve decided to just give yall the real.

I heard someone say once that grief doesn’t get smaller, you just grow around your grief and learn how to live with it. At first that sounded awful, but after a while it became kinda empowering. You may be waiting for the pain to be smaller, for you to miss the person less, for the wish that they were here to subdue but I’m not sure that would ever come. Instead, maybe we can all find hope in the fact that we will grow around our grief. We will rise to meet the occasion and maybe the pain that fills the 50% of our bodies will become 10% as we grow bigger.

Grief effects everyone differently. Never judge yourself for how you grieve. Sometimes you want to cry all day. Sometimes you want to do anything to forget the pain. But never judge yourself and please never judge others. People always talk about grief as an individual experience but it’s even harder to grieve with the ones closest to you. Mostly because everyone is going to react differently. Sometimes the person you are depending on to be warm and comforting will be closed and reserved. Sometimes that hurts just as bad as the grief.

I’m not sure what I am trying to say here. I know I’ve been all over the place. I’m grieving. Well, I love you guys. Praying everyone feels the joy, peace and love God promised us this week. It is our birthright.

forever blooming,

Mikaela Amira